#322 - Report - 30/04/06 - Roger Corbett, Cameron Corbett, Bill Bottomly, Stuart Hill.

Un-noticed by the majority these four hares and specifically the Corbett’s have been quietly climbing up the hare list. It was not that long ago as virgin hares they laid their first ride in the West Coast, oh how they have progressed. Indeed their rides have become noticeable for one aspect, their enthusiasm to look for new trail (not always easy to do in a shrinking Singapore) and the amount of time they put into their recce-ing. Last Sundays ride was no exception.

A somewhat hemmed in starting location, bearing in mind the National Parks Board views on riding on the pipeline and Macritchie generally, there was already a 270° exclusion zone from the car park, although the hares dealt with this well. Throw in an assault course and some tight jungle riding and they managed to shepherd the pack out onto the storm drain which leads to Jalan Kampong Chantek and onto to the old Turf Club where the pack rode round and round almost disappearing up their own backside looking for trail. The paper, which we were assured by the panicking hares “was there” had in their defense probably been chewed up by the large lawn mower, poor excuse I know, but it was the best one they had. A nice offroad loop through the now deserted horsy trails brought us out on Dunearn Road before tucking back in to join Rifle Range Road and part two of the trail. The hares had cunningly laid a ‘figure of eight’ trail which saw on home down RRR for those who were puffed or heading North on the gas pipeline for those who wanted more adventure. There was actually a choice of small extra loop or larger extra loop however I feel the hares had underestimated the timing of the assault course/tight jungle trail (probably only took them a few minutes when the four of them passed through – try getting fifty riders through?) so by the time the main pack got to the split point it was already 1200 so a decision was made – short loop. This saw a nice fast trail along the pipeline on the Bukit Timah trail, still good riding after all these years, and home down RRR with a third crossing of the BKE flyover (surely that must be a record?).

A lively circle saw the introduction of four virgins, one of whom Nate deserves special mention. Having been posted to Singapore in January this was, as he exclaimed himself “the best excitement I have had since I have been here!!!” Now don’t get me wrong, I would be the first to stand up and proclaim that the bike hash was exciting, I would be most disappointed if it wasn’t! but “best excitement……..!!!!!!!” – what the f*ck have you been doing since January? Best excitement? Let the Grand Master take you down Desker Road – I’ll show you “best excitement!!”. Whilst on the subject of Desker Road, well bars anyway, a special mention should be made of one of our other virgins, Hannah (not that we would ever expect to see her in Desker Road?) who whilst out fishing for men last Friday night was picked up by, would you believe it?, Fat Crashing B*stard! I know, not the first name that springs to mind when you think of lounge lizards but there he was, hanging out in some down town bar where his smooth party line “Do you fancy going to the bike hash on Sunday?” certainly won over Hannah who turned up nice and early – and she doesn’t even have a bike!!! What about that for a smooth chat up line, might have to try it myself some day? (……then again maybe not?). But I digress - so there was Nate, virgin rider, best excitement, lots of down downs, Quote of the Day and to cap it all gets a hash name on his first ride – VDH (Visible Dick Head). This is a play on another hash name (long since departed) but the old timers may remember the christening of VDL (Visible Dick Line) about ten years ago after a ride out of Pepys Road? Well trust our own cuddly Coo Chi Coo to first notice, and then secondly suggest this most appropriate name (well it is/was – although I have to admit that I did not notice it myself, then again I don’t go round looking in/at men’s underpants!). So with that it was off to Valentino’s Italian restaurant where an excellent lunch was served. The spiciest (some people might just call it hot, …….some people might just call it f*cking hot!) pasta you have ever tasted and excellent home made pizza that just kept on appearing, and appearing, and appearing, and appearing, and appearing. Where was it all coming from? We could certainly see where it was all going – into Cameron’s tummy, for a skinny runt (used as a noun and not in its informal context) he certainly puts it away, good job he’s Dad’s rich? Who else could afford to feed him, well apart from the United Nations World Food program that is!

So another highly enjoyable outing with the Singapore Bike Hash is over, but do not worry if you missed it, we will ride again in three weeks out of Sembawang where the Old Farts Team promise us something special….a trip to the Nelson Bar for afternoon aperitifs. Not quite up to Desker Road standard but not far short either? Come down and see a side of Singapore that you did not even know existed, or would probably want to know for that matter!!!

On On

Barbarian

Grand Master